I think the Jews got it right, the marking of the new year in autumn. Leaving aside any debate about whether life begins at conception or at birth,* there’s something intuitive and irrepressibly hopeful, poetic even, about the seeds of some future beginning taking hold in autumn, lying dormant and warm beneath the earth over the cold, dark, hard winter, to nudge their vernally green buddy heads above the surface of snow-scruff and the pungent mud of spring. Certainly more intuitive than beginning the year on January 1st – only a week or so after the longest night of the entire year; hell, only a week or so after the season of winter has technically begun – when all the world (well, the northern hemisphere) is dead, still, and frozen. That’s supposed to represent a new beginning, then?!? What calendrical maniac hoodwinked a whole culture to swallow hook, line, and all that the new year should begin smack dab in the chapter of death and darkness? It just doesn’t feel right. Read the rest of this entry »
Category Archives: Tickled Tongued & Cheeked
One of my favorite protest signs from last year read “Walker Like An Egyptian.” I saw it the first day of what would turn out to be the month-long (if not longer) uprising in Wisconsin — the first such occupation in America during 2011. Back then, demonstrators were still descending upon Tahrir Square in Cairo. Scott Walker was and is no Hosni Mubarak, of course, and what had been (and still is) going on in Egypt was drastically worse than the portentous inauguration of the new Republican administration. No doubt about it. But what was happening in Egypt last year in February was historic, as would be our contemporary uprising in the Dairy State. Was Madison the new Cairo, the state Capitol building the new Tahrir Square? No, but the analogy was understandable. So a sign that punned a 1980s hit song by the Bangles with the governor’s name while invoking a subversive political message was perfect: Scott Walker was like Hosni Mubarak in a sense, and what we had been watching on TV half a world away was now taking place in our own backyard — and we were there, in live time; and like Mubarak, who would eventually agree to step down, so too should Walker have.
And all of this takes on a new meaning with respect to Passover this year. So with that in mind I am delighted to share with you unedited the very witty and well-done “Wisconsin Union Passover Seder Guide” penned by Ann Imig — just in case you thought Friday Night Fish Fry and gefilte fish were the the only crossroads between Sconnie and Ashkenazi. Read the rest of this entry »
April 1st 2012: If the roused rabble in Dane County cries, “One year longer, we only get stronger,” then its flip-side in Waukesha County rallies around “One year later, we only get delayed-er.” For once again, after a spring election in Wisconsin, none other than Waukesha County Clerk Kathy Nickolaus finds herself in the center of a centripetal incompetence where even moderate conservatives begin to wonder, “dude lady, WTF?”
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April 1st 2012: Torn between running for re-election as mayor of Milwaukee or getting a mulligan to run against Scott Walker again in a recall election for governor of Wisconsin, in a surprise move Democrat Tom Barrett left the jaws of pundits county- and countrywide dropping today by announcing that instead he plans on running against Barrack Obama to become the next president of the United States.
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In Scribbles‘ humble attempt to merge politics and pop culture (if only to point out the increasingly blurred line between the two), we would like to hightail the lowbrow with the following poll:
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Something is rotten in the state of Indiana. Or as one lawmaker has it, America — as in the Girl Scouts of America. Filed under “So Fatuous, Even The Onion Couldn’t Make This Shit Up,” Republican State Assemblyman Bob Morris of Fort Wayne is strident in his one-man mission to expose the shocking truths behind the Girl Scouts of America’s two-pronged credo:
1) to be “a tactical arm of Planned Parenthood” that makes girls “more receptive to the pro-abortion agenda”; and 2) promoting “homosexual lifestyles” while honoring noted “feminists, lesbians, and Communists” at the expense of prayer and singing Christmas carols.
His faith-based evidence and methodological praxis of research? He Googled it. Read the rest of this entry »
I won’t deny it: at first I thought it kinda cute. Flattering even. Granted, all the attention was a little much, a bit overboard for sure, but I was feeling lonely at the time – I can hardly be blamed for that. But history, I am confident, will show that I did nothing to entice it; didn’t ask for it, didn’t encourage it. Yet how quickly it started to spiral out of control! So I did what any self-respecting person in my position would do: I called the cops and got a restraining order on Jesus Christ to leave me the hell alone already. Read the rest of this entry »
The things I’d like to say to you but know I never can
Are all the gifts I burn to give rejected out of hand.
You think I’m daft and maybe fay, a grown-down Peter Pan
With all my winks & cheekiness as though from Neverland.
‘Cause like a clown who hates himself yet plays his opposite –
Which is my role, performed & plied to the caboodle’s kit,
Match wit for woe & tat for tit, collect my props & skit –
I could not be more serious, my love more requisite.
It you eludes, the man I am behind the mask & laughs,
The horns & honks & handkerchiefs, the lines I have to gaffe:
A lark like me so quaint & cute acts like a horse’s ass —
Look at that suit! Behold those shoes! He saws himself in half!
Many, many thanks to Ape Con Myth for bringing this to my attention.
And Happy Birthday America!
Because things in Wisconsin are more split and divided now than that terrible part in Scott Walker’s receding hair, people on both sides of the aisle are reaching out. Here are two pleas to Republicans:
Dear Former Colleagues,
I am writing you this letter to officially announce my resignation from the party. It’s not fun anymore. We’ve become the opposite of what we used to stand for. Up until the last thirty-odd years it had been a real pleasure working together. We used to believe in prudence – we were conservative. As in conservation. Of all sorts of resources. But now it’s all waste and spoil. Blood, money – we’ve become a raging hemophiliac with a severe hemorrhaging problem. Read the rest of this entry »